Journal: #197 I Have Not Yet Begun To Fight

Daily Journal
Written By Nik Curfman

I had it 80% finished, the post about my break through yesterday. It was going to be great for me to publish. And yet, technology being what it is, I hit the wrong button. 90 minutes of work and research vanished into the digital void. Just like that.

Such is life.

It’s a perfect way to end this imperfect day. That’s no complaint. I’m not mad at today. I’m not even mad about my deleted post. I’ll write and post it tomorrow. It’s that whatever energy I had to fight such a disappointing moment is gone. It is what it is.

Today, was another slobberfest, by the way. I encountered more tears and sudden outbursts of emotion. Thank God I work from my laptop and have freedom to go for walks at any time.

I took time to enjoy the stars on my late evening stroll tonight. I thought about the the time required for the light from the closest start to reach my eyes. It’s 81,000 years. That’s a really long time. So on a day like today, I’m allowed to be disappointed and upset. Tomorrow will come, and the sun will shine.

I have no yet begun to fight.

Thank you Lord for loving me. It’s the greatest honor.

Amen.

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Nik Curfman

I am a writer and artist in the early stages of my trek. I spent 20 years trying to be who I thought I needed to be, and now I am running after who I am. Fearless Grit is my space to document and share the process. 

https://fearlessgrit.com
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Journal: #198 It Was About Being
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Journal: #196 Mentally And Emotionally Fried