Journal: #187 Battling My Lies

Daily Journal
Written By Nik Curfman

I wonder if insecure feelings will ever go away. Maybe some will, like loneliness. (Loneliness is a state of mind as it is.) What I want to know is it is possible to live life without feeling inadequate or belittled? Can I live without nagging doubt?

On January 26th, 2021, I have no firm answer. How can I? My life is not completed.

Fight On

What I do know, what I believe, is I can fight through it. I’d rather not feel like a phony. It would be awesome if I never battled my self-esteem again. But, until that day, I must go to war with those emotions intended to drag me into the void of despair.

From Secure To Faith

My life was completely different a year ago. I thought I knew what was ahead and felt up to task. On days like today, it’s the opposite. I have no clue what lay ahead in my life, only a vague picture.

I know I’m loved and worthy of love. I’m thankful to be surrounded by people who love and appreciate me. Moreover, the men I work with are kind and honest. I didn’t expect to be spit out of one business venture into something built for me and my disposition.

Never Surrender to Lies

There is hope I can achieve a lasting victory over my fears. For one, life with Jesus means anything is possible. The other is more subtle. It’s mental. The lies are in my head, not my reality. Want proof? Ok. How’s this? Today, I was given a promotion. Crazy, eh?

If the lies are in my head, then they can be out of my head. This is my hope, and out of this hope comes faith. I don’t need to have all the answers for my flaws. It is the work of the Lord and His grace on me. I trust the Lord to do what He alone can do in my heart and mind.

More Lord. #LFG

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Nik Curfman

I am a writer and artist in the early stages of my trek. I spent 20 years trying to be who I thought I needed to be, and now I am running after who I am. Fearless Grit is my space to document and share the process. 

https://fearlessgrit.com
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