Abstract: A Gift For Both Of Us

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When I was a chubby child,

yearning to be loved,

I thought of Natalee.

She was the standard,

of beauty and brains.

Naturally, I did nothing with my crush of feelings,

I let her slip away.

I was ashamed of who I was,

my clothes,

And, my church.

Nothing about me was good enough for her,

A lie that dictated my life,

Far too long.

Then there was Mary,

Cathy,

Heather,

Faith,

Alison,

and some others.

Each one of them experienced the fake me,

The imposter,

Desperately trying to be anyone else.

To be confident, brash, strong,

Prepared, and wealthy.

Now, I’m a man,

still kinda chubby,

No crushes to endure at the moment.

But, my praise rises to heaven,

as I consider the hell I was saved from,

because I’m not yet married.

She would’ve married an insecure boy,

a loving person,

but an imposter nonetheless.

She would’ve had to endure his flops and anger,

his sudden changes and emotional outbursts,

his self-loathing insecurity.

God’s Grace,

no woman will have to endure or persevere,

The worst of me.

Whoever falls in love with my heart,

The one who won’t let go,

She’ll enjoy the best me.

A gift to us both.

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