It feels wrong,

to give up on something,

I believed was good.

Keenly,

I’m aware,

I was the only one who dared believe such a thing.

Every relationship,

is about two,

always two.

Their hopes and fear,

past and preferences,

pain and desires.

One cannot carry two,

be the source of joy and peace,

or dismantle doubts and fears of the other.

Every relationship,

is about each of the two,

each fighting for themselves and the other.

She stopped fighting for herself,

for me,

and sunk into her shame place.

Still,

why is it so hard for me,

to give up on her?

Why does my heart cling to hidden hopes,

of a moment orchestrated by God,

an epic resurrection?

I have no answer,

so I offer none.

This is where I am today.