Vol IV: #18 Busy, But Not Busy
The phrase “I’m busy” has got to be the biggest load of shit in the 21st Century. We’re not busy, at least, not all the time. There are days and seasons when our calendars are packed and we long for the long slow days to come, but that’s not the norm. Think I’m being arrogant? Ok. Check your phone? Check your internet browser and Netflix watch histories? The data says we spend, on average, four to seven hours per day checking our phones, browsing the internet, and watching streaming content. Even if you’re on the low side, that’s still 28 hours every week. (That goes for mothers too.) And, I’m as guilty as anyone.
Fact is, I love a good YouTube video. That platform is packed with amazing people who creating great content. And it’s all free! How nuts is that? Every morning, I can choose the exact length and intensity of workout from thousands of yoga videos, compare recipes to try a new dish, and laugh. And yet, I feel this nipping pull in my mind because I know I’m wasting my time. It’s the same as when I was kid and sat in front of the TV for hours instead of study or read. Oh, if I could go back and tell that boy what to do and what not to do. Right at the top would be to “stop watching TV.” Then I’d thrust a book into my hands, something I’d like to read rather than the crap forced on us in school. Hopefully, I’d listen to myself… But, since I can’t reach back in time, I will look at myself today and ask what can you change today, Nik?
I know what I want to be. I want to be that guy that is so engrossed in the doing that I miss news events and can’t remember the last show I watched. I want to need a calendar and forget the names of my favorite YouTube channels. The big hurdle in all this is the habit and the tiniest bits of dopamine linked to the habit. We don’t check our phones and constantly refresh social media feeds because we have nothing better to do. No. It’s because we are addicted to the behavior. I love to learn and laugh and YouTube fills both needs. And though I try to lie to myself, I know the real reason I watched 20-30 videos a day is more about getting my fix than learning or laughing.
And you want to know something, I justify my phone time. I literally tell myself I need this. And the truth is, no, I do not. I’m ready to evolve*.
The last time I tried this, to limit my time watching stuff, I lasted three days. Perhaps my methods were at fault? I went cold turkey and I do not suggest it. The silence will eat you up. Instead, I’m going to try and find my way as I go. Then, after a few weeks, I’ll form an intentional plan. My aim is to limit my phone time to an hour or less per day and watch less than five YouTube videos per day (or 30 minutes total, which ever comes first.) If I can hit those numbers, I’ll give myself the gift of 30 additional hours per week. Crazy right? I’m looking forward to what comes from it. Hopefully, I’m truly busy.
*I’m not a Luddite. Far from it. The technology we have now is more than new tools and new ways to produce more food or clothes. What we have in our hands is the ability to numb out, to disconnect from our day and destiny, and waste as much time as our battery life allows.
