I turned 43 on Tuesday. And when I called my parents for the perfunctory birthday chat , I told them of my desire to live another 80 years. And we laughed about the idea of me as an old crank, spinning stories about corded phones and three channels on the faux wooden box we called a TV. I admit, I love the idea of being shriveled and saggy and doling out unsolicited advice to all in earshot.

Given I plan to be old, I might as well start to dole out what I know, as practice for later. I’ve did something similar when I turned 40- you made read so here: 40 Year Old Wisdom- and want to make this post an annual post, every year around my birthday. Why not? It will be fun to compare what makes the list from year to year. When I turned 40, I was very much into healthy living with a particular focus on mental health. And I was long-winded. LOL. Today, you will read a list, intentionally more simple. Let go of pain as soon as possible. Anger and offense will not empower you or help you. 

1. Love.

2. Eat well.

3. Act.

4. Sleep well, your day and body depend on it.

5. Exercise a little everyday. Your mind will thank you.

6. A good man is not without sin. A good man does not surrender to or justify his sins. 

7. Nothing good is quick and nothing quick is good. Ask any woman.

8. Spend the money on durable and quality goods/services. 

9. Cheap is the road to addiction.

10. Love people, not their opinions or views.

11. Give grace to everyone. No exceptions.

12. Boundaries are healthy.

13. As the Man said, let your yes be yes and no be no.

14. Work is good.

15. Everyone is an amateur when they begin. The champions and experts find reasons to keep going.

16. Learn to cook.

17. Learn to clean.

18. Learn to listen, without judgment. 

19. Nothing good happens after 10 pm.

20. Children are children. They need rules, consequences, patience, and kindness. 

21. Trust but verify.

22. Ask for exactly what you want, not what you think the other side can give.

23. God answers prayer, but not all of them. 

24. Pray all day, everyday. 

25. God is good.

26. God is loving and kind.

27. God knows who you are and what you need.

28. Our lives are a journey of finding our most authentic self.

29. Listen to good advice, but own your decisions.

30. Keep going.

31. Either talk about it and get over it. Or let it go. But don’t hold onto resentment. Resentment is a cancer to your soul. 

32. Honor your mom and dad. They did the best they could.

33. Gratitude will guard your heart from hypocrisy and self-pity.

34. Learn to build yourself up rather than relying on the compliments of others. 

35. Know your worth, it is inherent in your person, not what you do.

36. When the day is done, take time to recall what was good. 

37. You are responsible for your actions. 

38. Learn to have hard conversations devoid of anger or anxiety.

39. Be loyal, but don’t follow friends into the pit. 

40. Save a little of every dollar you're given or earn. 

41. Empower those around you to act for themselves. 

42. Laugh as often as possible.

43. Learn both to relax in silence and work in chaos.